The Dreamcatcher

Most people say that when you start dreaming about something, you don’t just simply let it pass by and do nothing. It’s a vicious cycle, spinning to and fro like a beach ball bouncing and rolling down a steep pavement. When you start dreaming, you would suddenly start to find yourself inside a confinement doing everything to make those dreams a reality. Stop dreaming and you’d resemble a shriveling raisin under the scorching sun.

I started dreaming of becoming a doctor when I was seven. Back in those years, I used to hang out in my uncle’s clinic. His clinic wasn’t grandiose. It was just a small office space just enough for an examination table, a cabinet where he kept an old microscope and a metal canister of alcohol swabs, and his personal table to fit inside. He’s a pediatrician. A really good one. Everyday, about fifty kids of different ages, held closely by their parents, goes in and out of his clinic to seek for his advice. His clinic was located just inside the four walls of our ancestral compound in the province. That is where I witnessed how his life went throughout the day, giving advices, interviewing patients or parents, administering drugs and vaccines, and so on. In those years, the dream started. In those years, I said to myself, “someday, I’m going to become just like him”.

Another dream unexpectedly came nearly a decade ago. Let me tell you a fact. As a person grows up, the items in his personal list of dreams will surely pile up. It’s utterly true. For me, this new dream was something else. It is something that would make one rally through the end no matter how hard or how long it would take like a triathlete running, swimming, and biking his way through the finish line. Everyday was a battle resembling the ones that I encounter everyday in medical school. There were fun days and there were days that exhausted me, leaving me helpless as a cowering prey. Through the ups and downs, I proved, however, that the everyday battles that I had for this dream to become a reality were all worth fighting for. Nope. I am still not talking about the path to becoming a physician. I’m talking about the girl that I met eight years ago.

Today, I’m standing on the edge of a cliff feeling the wind whip on my clothes as I enjoy the truly breathtaking hues of blues of the fair sky and the perfect horizon. The road behind me diverged into two separate paths, coercing me to choose one to take on the way home. Diverging roads taking on different paths. Bummer. If there’s one thing to hate about life, it’s choices. I always see it as unfair. I mean why do you have to choose if you can just have both? Or why can’t you just have both in the first place? Not fair. From this moment, however, I would just lift everything to the Universe. I know that someday, the diverging road behind me would soon converge a few yards just before reaching home. Whichever path I take, whichever dream I pursue, I know that fate has something really big in store for me. Someday, I will catch all my dreams. Someday, we will.

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A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream that you dream together is reality. 

– John Lennon

~ RA

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